Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Pointless or, Pity Party for One?

Do you ever look at your life and wonder why on earth you are where you are? Do you ever just sit back and think "what on earth am I actually here for?" I am aware at this point that it sounds like I could do with a good dose of The Purpose Driven Life, but I did that last time I was terminally unemployed, and given that that was only such a short time ago, I'm not convinced its been long enough to make a difference again. Today is most definitely *not* a Pollyanna day.

The only thing stopping this pity party for one is the knowledge in the back of my mind that, however pointless I feel that there must be a purpose for me somewhere. Right now, I can't see it. I have no idea why my patience is being tested in so many different ways. I have no idea what I'm meant to be learning. I have no idea why things are being given with one hand and taken away with the next leaving me splitting my life between 2 counties, not fitting in in either, with no money to speak of to my name.

I have no answers. And to be honest, I'm surprised I found this many words.

Love, etc.

p.s. I may have been overstating when I said the pity party was being held at bay. Clearly it is not.


pinkjellybaby said...

I feel exactly the same. Just a bit pointless.

Bluebelle said...

It sucks. It will change. You will bring the West Wing too and we will eat and things will be good. :) x

LeLe said...

I've been in your place before. It's no fun but it doesn't last forever...chin up, deary.

lucythevaliant said...

Here's a great big mama hug! You don't have to know your purpose to be fulfilling it, sweetie. Every little thing that you do is part of His plan for the whole world!

Lani said...

I totally have felt that way.. all the time actually. Hang in there, because you WILL figure it out!

I would love for you to stop by the Blog For A Cure Blog Party I am hosting all week long at http://whoknewreviews.blogspot.com!
Its a great way to get new followers, win some prizes and support the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society!