Understanding

At heart, I am a musician. Nothing thrills me more than hearing a piece of music, particularly orchestral music, and losing myself in how it all fits together and picking out all the different parts and melodies.

I was listening to a piece the other day that I'd once played in an orchestra and started to focus on a tune I'd never heard before - I was amazed that I'd managed to not only rehearse it regularly but also perform the piece a number of times and yet there was still more that I hadn't heard. I was reminded of one time where I'd had to leave the rehearsal for some reason, and walking back into the hall, as I crossed the room to get back on the stage, I remember trying to work out which piece they'd moved on to rehearsing because I didn't recognise it. Turned out it was the same piece they'd been playing when I left, but from outside of my little seat in the middle of the Strings section, it sounded so completely different that I didn't know what it was.

Recently, I've come to realise that this is sometimes (often?) true of our lives - sitting there knowing we've done all the rehearsing and preparing and ready to do it, but actually not really seeing the full picture at all, and not knowing what to do when we're confronted with it. Its taken some long struggles, some that are still lingering yet, but I'm finally starting to accept that there is always a reason and there's always something learnt.

"Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps,

you understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right, and stopping the leaks

in the roof, and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and you are not surprised.

But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably, and

does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is

building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new

wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards.

You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building

a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself."

The bigger picture is there - just don't miss it in preparing your own little bit, however perfect you think you're making it.

Love, etc.

xx